Moura 3341

Moura has arrived.

It still feels like winter, but the sun is out all day and the tiny little birds have returned, flocking to the birdbaths in the yard every morning. We didn't get any snow this winter: one afternoon some flakes came, melting as they fell, blown off a storm on the mountain,  though its still cold enough at night that everything freezes solid. I go out early each morning to break the ice and refill the birdbaths and watch the water steam in the air for a few minutes. The birds will arrive in an hour and a half -- every day, at 8:30 and 5:30 the birds come to the yard in the dozens. By summer we'll have more than forty every evening. Our cats quite enjoy the view!

Moura has arrived -- and Sai Raya's year is already drawing to a close! It seems this year went much faster than last. Before she takes her leave of us, however, we shall have one final lesson from Sai Raya, that Janya most closely associated with the bright Mother Herself, and I wonder (as I do each year) what that lesson will be. Certain years I don't expect to be difficult, such as Sai Mati's year (3338), had very difficult Mouras, while other years I was apprehensive, such as Sai Rhavë's year (3340), were nothing like what I expected. Though I have an image of Sai Rhavë as a stern figure, the Moura that year was very gentle in showing where I was falling short and in a sense was very forgiving. If I didn't want to learn, Sai Rhavë was not going to make me; Sai Mati on the other hand was a hard-hitter. So I am completely unsure what to expect from Sai Raya's Moura, though for now I expect something of working through my fears and certain difficulties that have plagued me for several years.

As we come to the close of the year, this final season, there have been some lovely moments of illumination, as it were. Certain things finally settling, others finally blooming. Faith is ever an ongoing journey! It is a relief as I grow older to find this wayward hesitancy, of flitting from one thing to the next and totally abandoning the old, the fear of committing to one thing in case it is not wholly perfect, is fading. That impulsive chase of other things doesn't leave me wounded like it used to; when it appears I can handle the search better than I used to, ask my questions and find my answers better than I could. For much of my faith, I always felt like I needed permission to believe, to find approval out there for what I thought, and in many aspects I finally found it. I don't think it's a coincidence that it happens in a year ruled by the Janyati of the Sun!

So for me, I shall be trying to work with Sai Raya to learn what I need, let go of what I should, and fully experience Moura to the best of my ability. I have challenges ahead, and a hill to climb that I have made into a veritable mountain over the years, and I hope with Heaven's grace I shall reach the top and realize it wasn't so big after all!

May we all have a much-blessed Moura!